Mothers’ Child Custody Rights – Modify Your Custody Order

Sometimes a custody order is put into place that doesn’t fairly represent both the mother’s and the father’s custody and visitation rights. The ideal is that the order is in the best interest of the child and that both parents agree to it. However, if a mother feels like her custody and visitation rights have been denied, or that the order isn’t the best one for her child, she should petition to have the custody order modified.

In order to get a custody order modified, the mother must prove to the court that there has been a change in circumstance to warrant a new order. This change of circumstance can include new information the court should hear, a move by one of the parents, the child growing older, or any number of things can should alter the order. A parent saying they just want more time with the child isn’t enough to get the order changed. The court views stability as the best thing for the child, and they won’t make constant changes to the order at the request of one of the parents.

If you feel like your rights as a mother aren’t being upheld, then you need to prepare a solid case as to why the custody order should be modified. You will need to explain to the judge and to the court that your new parenting plan is the best for your child, and that your child may be harmed in some way if the court doesn’t accept this new plan.

Reasons the court will change the order:

If the child is being neglected physically and isn’t being cared for, you should immediately file for a custody order modification and then provide evidence to the court. You could get teachers, doctors, or other specialists to testify that your child isn’t doing very well.
If your child isn’t doing well emotionally because of the order. Some children have a hard time adjusting and need special consideration. If there has been an order put in place that the child doesn’t like, the child could become depressed or anxious. If you notice that your child isn’t doing well in school anymore, has withdrawn, and seems depressed, you should look at your current custody and visitation agreement. Perhaps the mother was the primary caregiver and the court awarded more time to the father. This can negatively affect the child. If that’s the case, you need to show the court how more time with the mother would benefit the child.
One of the parents has moved to another area. If the parents have shared joint custody, but one of them moves, the parents may need to modify the agreement. Custody and visitation time can be altered to give the child the most stability.

If you are not happy with the custody order, don’t just let it go. Stand up for your custody and visitation rights as a mother and petition for a new order. Hopefully then you can get the time you want with your child. 

Find out more information about mothers’ child custody rights and discover how Custody X Change can help you get a child custody modification for your order.

Child Behavior Modification and Control Myth Busted

Many parents strive to learn child behavior modification and control techniques. Sadly, this approach is based on a faulty assumption. It assumes that parents really have control over their child’s behaviors.

The truth is, you do not have control over anyone but yourself. Even if you exert pressure in the form of rewards and punishments to change your child’s behavior, they still choose how they will behave.

You can beg, plead, cajole, punish, and urge. You may get cooperation. You may get compliance. You might even see the behavior you want to see. When they choose to cooperate, it might look like you have control, but you don’t. Before your child’s behavior changes, they have to choose to cooperate with you.

Some people would say that their children had to cooperate or else. Here’s the question to consider: Or else what? If they want to accept some type of incredibly uncomfortable, painful, or otherwise unpleasant consequence as the result of their behavior, they can. It may seem crazy, but they could choose to accept painful, negative experiences rather than cooperate with you. It is always up to them what they actually do in any given situation.

Early in our experience as parents, we found that we had a much higher success rate with our kids when we worked to influence their behaviors rather than to control them. Every time we try to control them, they push back in some way. When we use influence strategies, they generally cooperate.

Here are three of our favorite influence strategies:

  * Strive to always say please and thank-you to both your spouse and your children.

  * Talk about the behavior you want to see more than the behavior you don’t want to see.

  * Name the behavior in specific terms rather than label your child with non-specific labels. For example, say “thank you for picking-up your dirty laundry” rather than “you’re such a good boy.”

Interestingly enough, the less we try to control, the more our children cooperate. In the end, accepting that we only have influence with others (including our children) has given us more apparent “control” because they normally choose to willingly cooperate.

With his wife Sandra, Guy Harris co-created a positive parenting program called The Behavior Bucks System. Guy and Sandra Harris are both Human Behavioral Consultants and parents.

Child Behavior Modification – Tips For Child Behavior Modification

React or Over React

Many times as a parent we tend to react to our kids with behavioral problems rather than responding to the situation at hand with child behavior modification. We all know that in the “heat of the moment,” when our kid is pushing all of our buttons and seems to be doing it purposely. We have a tendency to react out of anger, and many times this results in overreaction and we end up being too harsh in the moment. We think that child behavior modification is verbally lashing out or even worse, instead of handling the situation with the grace and poise that an adult should be able to display.

Short Term Parenting?

This is what would be referred to as “short term parenting.” The reason is, in that particular moment all your youngster wants is for Mom or Dad to comfort them, to make the pain go away, or to make them feel secure, and when we overreact to the situation, we do anything but comfort our child. We as parents need to keep child behavior modification in mind, of course we want our kids to obey us and for all of us to be happy as a family.

Long Term Parenting?

We need to start thinking in the realm of long term parenting. To chart a long term parenting road map if you will. We’ll follow with a few long term parenting strategies.

How about starting with a plan. Think to yourself, what do I want as a family? What type of home life would I like for my family? We’re talking about quality of life issues, not necessarily material things. Yes, material things can be nice, but remember the old saying “money can’t buy you love”. We can all be happy without the material things in life, beyond the basic necessities, we really don’t need much. Connected relationships with our spouse and children will naturally help with child behavior modification. If you don’t have that family connection, you don’t have much. Once you have planned out your road map for your family, you can then begin working backwards to figure out the details that you and your family will need to focus on daily to shape up your home life.

Utilize Specific Strategies

Begin to use specific strategies. If your kid is behaving badly and you have determined that this type of acting up is not acceptable, it may be time for some child behavior modification. Instead of you as a parent reacting or overreacting to the situation. Sit down and come up with a plan to handle the situation with grace and effectiveness. Determine to come up with a reasonable plan to help your child understand that this be behavior is not acceptable and won’t be tolerated. This is what is called child behavior modification.

Prizes For Being Good

Child behavior modification can also be utilized in possibly giving out prizes at the end of the week or the month for good behavior. With younger children, more frequently may be necessary due to the shorter attention span of children at this age.

Child behavior modification is a lengthy subject and much too long for the space that we’re allotted here. To learn more about a happy and healthy relationship with your kids, please follow the link below…

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Child Behavior Modification – Tried and True Methods of Child Behavior Modification

Child Behavior Modification In A Nutshell

A defiant or bad acting youngster can put a strain on your entire family. Not just you as the parent, but the entire family. This is where child behavior modification comes into the picture. Discipline your youngster can and does many times lead to tension within the family.

Other siblings as well as the parents. At times the parents may choose another avenue in dealing with their problem youngster. Such choices as play therapy, another may be cognitive therapy, all the results generally show that child behavior modification is the best route to take with a disruptive youngster.

What Is Child Behavior Modification?

Parents start by organizing a schedule for the youngster which the youngster is aware of ahead of time. this schedule must be adhered to by both parent and adolescent and must rarely be changed except of course in emergency situations where it is impossible to stick to the schedule. If you are going to need to change the schedule, advanced notice should be given.

A reward type system is implemented along with this schedule, a reward for being good or a treat periodically, time frame chosen by the parent and agreed with by the young one. While poor behaviors will be dealt with by removal of certain privileges or other consequences. Only you, the parent can deem what is proper and fair in a given situation.

Elder Children and Child Behavior Modification

Generally with older children and early teens, parents will need to learn various strategies for the seemingly inherent behaviors in these older children, such as their not abiding by a curfew or skipping nightly homework.

Contracts can be drawn up with older kids, agreed to by the teen and the parent, this also involves the teen and feels that their input is also important. It instills a sense of responsibility by being involved in the process instead of just being told what to do. In the short and the long run, it will teach rights and responsibilities which is important for child behavior modification.

Where To From Here

In utilizing child behavior modification techniques, parents learn to deal with many different aspects of varying behaviors, from obnoxious and terrible attitudes, to laziness, defiant or aggressive behaviors, yelling, arguing and many more. There is a program that I highly recommend below that was instituted by a highly regarded adolescent behaviorist, you can find the link below…

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